SOME METHODS DERIVED FROM THE ABOVE
MENTIONED MARRIAGE
1. The many customs as regards engagement
are contrary to the Sunnah. In fact, many are
against the Shariah and are regarded sins. A
verbal proposal and answer is sufficient.
2. To unnecessarily delay Nikah of both the
boy and the girl after having reached the age
of marriage is incorrect.
3. There is nothing wrong in inviting one’s
close associates for the occasion of Nikah.
However, no special pains should be taken in
gathering the people from far off places.
4. It is appropriate that the bridegroom be a
few years older than the bride.
5. If the father of the girl is an Aalim or pious
and capable of performing Nikah, then he
should himself solemnise the marriage.
6. It is better to give the Mahr Faatimi and one
should endeavour to do so. But if one does
not have the means then there is nothing
wrong in giving less.
7. It is totally un-Islamic for those, who do not
possess the means, to incur debts in order to
have grandiose weddings.
8. It is fallacy to think that one’s respect will
be lost if one does not hold an extravagant
wedding and invite many people. What is our
respect compared to that of Rasulullah
(Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam)?
9. The present day practice of the
intermingling of sexes is an act of sin and
totally against Shariah.
10. There is nothing such as engagement
parties and Medhi parties in Islam.
11. Great care must be taken as regards to
Salaat on occasions of marriage by all – the
bride, the bridegroom and all the participants.
12. It is un-Islamic to display the bride on
stage.
13. The unnecessary expenses incurred by
the bride’s family in holding a feast has no
basis in Shariah.
14. For the engaged couple to meet at a
public gathering where the boy holds the
girl’s hand and slips a ring on her finger is a
violation of the Qur’anic law of Hijaab.
15. It is un-Islamic for the engaged couple to
meet each other and also go out together.
16. Three things should be borne in mind
when giving one’s daughter gifts and
presents at the time of Nikah:
* Presents should be given within one’s
means (it is not permissible to take loans, on
interest for such presents);
* To give necessary items;
* A show should not be made of whatever is
given.
17. It is Sunnat for the bridegroom’s family to
make Walimah.
Note: In Walimah, whatever is easily available
should be fed to the people and care should
be taken that the is no extravagance, show
and that no debts are incurred in the process.
18. To delay Nikah after the engagement is
un-Islamic.
SOME CUSTOMS
In aping Western methods sheepishly,
Muslims have adopted many customs which
are un-Islamic and frowned upon.
Some examples are:
* Displaying the bride on stage;
* Inviting guests for the wedding from far off
places;
* Receiving guests in the hall;
* The bride’s people incurring unnecessary
expenses by holding a feast which has no
basis in Shariah. We should remember that
Walimah is the feast arranged by the
bridegroom after the marriage is
consummated.
* It is contrary to Sunnah (and the practice of
some non-Muslim tribes in India) to wish,
hope for or demand presents and gifts for
the bridegroom, from the bride’s people. We
should always remember that our Nabi
(Sallallaahu Alayhi Wasallam) did not give Ali
(Radhiallaahu Anhu) anything except Dua.
JazaakAllahu khayran.